2026-05-17 · 11:42
CONFIRMEDofficially the wind's 4,802nd recorded visit to GALENA BLUFF was logged this morning — a small one!!! barely tousled the gorse!!! the gorse loved it anyway!!! it's the thought that counts!!!
FRIENDS!!! GENTLE READERS!!! LIFELONG ENTHUSIASTS OF EVEN-THE-SMALLEST-GUST!!!
we are SO honored, SO completely beside ourselves, to present AT LAST the authorized & definitive biographical exhibition of the only performer who has ever appeared continuously, without intermission, with zero understudies, for the entire duration of every single life you have ever personally known!!! that's right!!! we mean THE WIND!!! THE!!! WIND!!!
every plate in this gallery has been hand-buffed with the popular "tender-pasture haze" available free of charge from the wind's official patron archive (just ask the meadow at the bottom of the hill, she'll point you in the direction of the patron archive!!!), giving each composition that soft & airy quality you remember from every single afternoon nap you have ever taken on a porch!!!
we tried to keep it short!!! we failed!!! the wind has too many stories!!! please enjoy SEVEN OF THEM!!! more to follow, eventually, breathlessly, as the wind sees fit!!!
(if the wind disagrees with anything written here, the wind is invited & encouraged to revise it directly. just blow through the screen. we will accept the corrections in the spirit they were given.)
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here she is!!! the wind, freshly arrived, no bigger than the inside of a teacup, already humming!!! note the small mouth (perfectly round!!!) and the way the surrounding atmosphere has politely curved itself out of the way to let her stretch!!! the official biographer wept openly upon first viewing this plate!!! we have included a small notice at the bottom of the gallery confirming the official biographer's tears were entirely appropriate & in fact ENCOURAGED!!!
curatorial note: the wind has no documented birthday, so we celebrate every morning that has ever happened. all of them count!!! we are not exaggerating!!! all of them!!!
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the very first recorded whisper!!! transcribed by a pond that has since retired but kindly came back for the unveiling!!! the reeds in this plate are not bending out of fear, they are bending because the wind told them a funny secret & they are politely trying not to laugh!!! the secret was about a hat that fell into a fountain in 1788!!! we cannot share more details!!! the hat does not wish it!!!
the pond has asked us to credit it as: a very old pond (he/it). thank you, pond.
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the great sail era was the wind's first widely-attended live performance!!! the wind toured constantly!!! the wind never charged admission!!! the wind only asked that the sails be open & the deck be clear & that someone, anyone, occasionally yell "hooray!!!" from the crow's nest!!! the wind made approximately every continent reachable from every other continent!!! the wind did not invent maps but the wind made maps necessary & we feel that counts for something!!!
archival quibble: technically the wind was performing well before 1492, but 1492 is when somebody finally wrote a fan letter. the fan letter is preserved in the appendix below!!!
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oh the windmill!!! the wind & the windmill have been correspondents for SO long that they no longer need words!!! one turn of a blade is enough to say "i missed you, i missed you, i missed you!!!" & the wind says back "i am here, i am here, i am here!!!" & the blades turn again & this has been the entire conversation since the year a windmill was first built!!! it has never gotten boring!!! we asked!!! it has not!!!
the wind also corresponds with: kites, scarves, prayer flags, parking-lot pinwheels, the soft chimes outside any & all kitchen windows, and one very specific traffic cone in pendle, iowa. (the traffic cone declined to comment for this exhibit but did wobble politely in greeting.)
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the kite pact!!! every spring, every kite anywhere agrees to LIFT, & the wind agrees to LIFT BACK, & this happens millions of times simultaneously across many many fields & rooftops & small hilly parks & this is, in our completely unbiased opinion, the most beautiful contract ever ratified in any jurisdiction!!! the wind has never broken the pact!!! not once!!! sometimes the wind takes a small pause & the kite settles & then the wind says "sorry, sorry, sorry!!!" & lifts again!!! it is so wholesome!!! we are honestly tearing up just writing about it!!!
several kites have asked to be specifically named in this caption. due to space limitations we honor only the eldest: HONEYBEE, a yellow box kite from 1948, last seen over the great salt flats & presumed still airborne!!! we believe in you, honeybee!!!
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____/_______..oOO[]Oo--Oo--Oo--Oo--Oo--Oo--Oo--Oo--Oo[]_____.____\___
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the hill-and-meadow ballads!!! performed every single afternoon, regardless of audience size!!! the wind rolls across the grass & the grass rolls back & somewhere on the horizon a small two-car train passes through, & the wind always pauses to wave at it, & the train always toots its small horn back, & this is, frankly, the most romantic ongoing exchange currently happening on this planet!!!
the train in this plate is the 4:18 from MORNING-FORK to LITTLE TWILIGHT, a route mostly preserved for the comfort of one specific badger who likes to watch it go by!!! we did not invent the badger!!! the badger invented herself!!!
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the wind today!!! still going!!! still touring!!! still hatching small new gusts off the side of larger ones!!! the wind is currently somewhere very close to you & also somewhere very far!!! the wind is, & this is the official biographer's most fervent claim, NEVER GOING TO STOP!!! the wind is the longest-running performance in the history of performances!!! the closing date is NEVER!!! please tell your friends!!! please tell your relatives!!! please tell every small flag & every loose tarp!!! THE WIND IS LIVE TODAY & TOMORROW & FOREVER!!!
you can confirm exhibit VII by stepping outside & standing still for one minute. the wind will likely arrive & sign the air in front of you. (no pen required.)press the button to release one small breath into the gallery — it joins all the breaths ever pressed by everyone who has ever visited!!! you are now a CONFIRMED COLLABORATOR with the wind itself!!! welcome to the band!!!
curated breathlessly & without sleep by the OFFICIAL BIOGRAPHER & STAFF — buffed in the tender-pasture haze edition of our soft-air toolkit — printed on recycled wind
Footnote (set in the smallest type the gallery could justify): no living creature was disturbed in the production of this biography. one (1) napping cat was very briefly inconvenienced by a stray draft & received, as compensation, a thorough patch of late-afternoon sun. balance has been restored. the cat has signed off. her name is APRICOT. she did not wish to provide a quote at this time but did blink slowly in our direction, which we have, with permission, archived under "expressions of mild gallery-approval."